It's true. I AM sitting on top of the world. If someone had told me three years ago that I could and would be this happy today, I'd have punched them in the face for attempting to feed me false hope. I compare where I was then to where I am now and they aren't even in the same universe.
My grandpa and I just had a very touching heart-to-heart and I have to admit that I had to fight back the tears. I am not a crier, but this had me pretty choked up. He talked about how just a couple of years ago it was so hard to deal with me that he couldn't WAIT for me to "get out of here", but how he feels completely different now and how he sees all my potential. (Which he pointed out that my grandma never stopped seeing. And I'm very grateful to her for that.)
You have to understand . . . three years ago, I was miserable. With everything about myself. I was sick and in a horrible marriage. I hated the way I looked, felt, and acted. Honestly -- I was mean. Like . . . really mean. Which isn't my personality at. all. I think it's fair to say that I was completely "lost". No traces of my actual self. And it was a frightening world I was living in. And because of all of that, my personality was completely consumed and the only thing left was a scared and angry little girl with no light at the end of a really dark tunnel. I don't remember singing one single time in those 3 years. Not once! Not even in the shower! Now I don't even go an hour without at least humming a tune. It's probably a little annoying. Haha.
The only thing I did do (though, not much) was draw during that period of time. I did do about 5 or 6 drawings during those years. And I did my leopard painting, too. Other than that, I pretty much slept and threw tantrums. Haha.
Now I have the best boy. I'll be heading to school in a few short months. I've got a good head on my shoulders and I am smart. (That took a long time for me to admit to myself.) I'm drawing more. I'm singing again. I'm tan, I'm healthy, and I'm happy.
Oh yeah!
My grandpa and I just had a very touching heart-to-heart and I have to admit that I had to fight back the tears. I am not a crier, but this had me pretty choked up. He talked about how just a couple of years ago it was so hard to deal with me that he couldn't WAIT for me to "get out of here", but how he feels completely different now and how he sees all my potential. (Which he pointed out that my grandma never stopped seeing. And I'm very grateful to her for that.)
You have to understand . . . three years ago, I was miserable. With everything about myself. I was sick and in a horrible marriage. I hated the way I looked, felt, and acted. Honestly -- I was mean. Like . . . really mean. Which isn't my personality at. all. I think it's fair to say that I was completely "lost". No traces of my actual self. And it was a frightening world I was living in. And because of all of that, my personality was completely consumed and the only thing left was a scared and angry little girl with no light at the end of a really dark tunnel. I don't remember singing one single time in those 3 years. Not once! Not even in the shower! Now I don't even go an hour without at least humming a tune. It's probably a little annoying. Haha.
The only thing I did do (though, not much) was draw during that period of time. I did do about 5 or 6 drawings during those years. And I did my leopard painting, too. Other than that, I pretty much slept and threw tantrums. Haha.
Now I have the best boy. I'll be heading to school in a few short months. I've got a good head on my shoulders and I am smart. (That took a long time for me to admit to myself.) I'm drawing more. I'm singing again. I'm tan, I'm healthy, and I'm happy.
Oh yeah!
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